Category Archives: Articles by Barry

Listen and Learn

Barry Maher’s
Filling the Glass Newsletter
Speaking of Real World Tactics,
Reality-Based Motivation

February, 2015 Vol. 15 Issue 1

In this Issue:

Article: You Can Be Fascinating Without Saying a Word

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Hi Everyone:

Who wouldn’t love to be fascinating? Apparently, it’s far easier than most of us imagine. Thus this month’s article.

And as always, I’d like to invite you to connect with me at:

All the Best,

Barry

You Can Be Fascinating without Saying a Word

by Barry Maher

I always tell audiences that listening not only can make other people more interesting to you, it can make you more interesting to others. I was doing the keynote speech at a convention a while back, and afterwards, each of the speakers hosted a table at their awards dinner. The woman sitting on my right never stopped talking. Not for a moment. Not even to take a breath. I never got a word in edgewise and never even got to acknowledge the person seated on my left. (The ghost of Osama Ben Laden would have been sitting there naked for all I knew.)

Ten or twelve hours later when the meal finally ended, I crawled up to my hotel room. No sooner did I get there than I decided what I really needed was a visit to the bar for a drink or six.

I went to elevator, pushed the button, the elevator arrived and the doors opened. And who is standing there but the woman, talking (of course) to a companion.

“Oh, hello” she cries, refocusing the flow of words in my direction as she and her friend step off the elevator.

The horror!

Acknowledging her quickly, I jump on the elevator and as the doors start to close, I hear her say to her friend, “You know I had dinner with him tonight and he is most fascinating conversationalist.”

I’d never opened my mouth, the entire dinner.

Nothing makes you more interesting than listening.

If you enjoy this newsletter, please forward the URL to friends.
www.barrymaher.com/listen-and-learn

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“Innovative, informative, entertaining and inspiring” says MeetingsWest magazine.
Keynote, workshop and seminar topics include:

Filling the Glass: Real World Tactics for Increasing Productivity AND Job Satisfaction

Slicing through the Noise: Powerful Communication for Leadership and Professional Success

Selling Value, Not Price

Selling Yourself, Your Ideas, Your Vision, Even Your Product and Services

Shut Up and Speak: Non-Verbal Communication

De-Stress for Success: Managing Stress to Promote Work/Life Balance and Restore the Joy of Living.

Speaking of Motivation

Call 951-638-5025

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Return to articles page

Return to newsletter archives

Wouldn’t You Rather Have More than mere Motivational Speakers?

No Travel Expenses for Southern California (San Diego, Los Angeles; Palm Springs, etc.)
or Las Vegas Nevada.

Successful Networking

Barry Maher’s
Filling the Glass Newsletter
Speaking of Real World Tactics,
Reality-Based Motivation

December, 2014 Vol. 14 Issue 12

In this Issue:

Article: Networking Events Don’t Have to Be Awful. Really, They Don’t.

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Hi Everyone:

Welcome to our new website, almost a year in the making. This month’s article is about dealing with networking events, something I’m asked about frequently, something that many people find intimidating. So we’re offering a few simple tips that seem to work surprisingly well.

And as always, I’d like to invite you to connect with me at:

All the Best,

Barry

Networking Events Don’t Have to Be Awful. Really, They Don’t.

by Barry Maher

“I keep hearing that I should be attending more networking events to help build my business,” a middle-aged businessman said to me after a presentation the other day.

“And that doesn’t fill you with delight?” I guessed.

He shrugged. “The problem is that I run a plumbing business. I’m not a salesperson. I’m not a politician who knows how to work a room. I absolutely hate networking. Hate it. To me, it’s almost degrading. I feel like I’m begging perfect strangers to help me get business. I know it works for some people, but to me it’s a lot more distasteful than anything I ever had to deal with as a plumber. And that’s saying something, believe me. Is there any way I can get more comfortable with this kind of thing?”

“Maybe,” I said. “The best way I know to get comfortable is to work on making the other person comfortable.”
When I’m at a networking event myself, I’ll usually start out by approaching the most uncomfortable looking person available. I introduce myself, and often I ask, “Do you find these things as awkward as I do?”

That’s a great question because it takes the pressure off them and off you as well. Since they’re probably as shy as you are, it also shows confidence that you could even make that admission.

Networking gets a lot easier once you realize that it’s not about you, it’s about the person you’re talking to. The secret of effective networking is that it’s all about asking questions and learning about those you’re trying to connect with.

Most people:

1) Talk too much;

2) Listen too little;

3) Ask for the other person’s help much too soon.

Again, networking is not about you, It’s about finding out about the other person, perhaps even uncovering what you can do for them. In other words, it’s about building some sort of relationship—even if it’s a quick and very short-term relationship—before trying to find out what they might be able to do you. Without that relationship, you’re not networking, you’re cold calling, and there’s no more reason for that person to help you than any other stranger they might come across on the street.

This is just one more case where if you concentrate on the what’s-in-it-for-them the what’s-in-it-for you will usually take care of itself.

Usually. Not always. But usually is usually enough.

If you enjoy this newsletter, please forward the URL to friends.
www.barrymaher.com/networking

Book Barry Maher to speak at your next event.

To subscribe to this newsletter send a blank email to:
barrymaher-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

To unsubscribe send a blank email to:
barrymaher-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

“Innovative, informative, entertaining and inspiring” says MeetingsWest magazine.
Keynote, workshop and seminar topics include:

Filling the Glass: Real World Tactics for Increasing Productivity AND Job Satisfaction

Slicing through the Noise: Powerful Communication for Leadership and Professional Success

Selling Value, Not Price

Selling Yourself, Your Ideas, Your Vision, Even Your Product and Services

Shut Up and Speak: Non-Verbal Communication

De-Stress for Success: Managing Stress to Promote Work/Life Balance and Restore the Joy of Living.

Speaking of Motivation

Call 951-638-5025

Sign up for our newsletter

Return to articles page

Return to newsletter archives

Wouldn’t You Rather Have More than mere Motivational Speakers?

No Travel Expenses for Southern California (San Diego, Los Angeles; Palm Springs, etc.)
or Las Vegas Nevada.

Want That Promotion? Seven Great Ways To Get It

Hi Everyone:

You want that promotion. You need that promotion. You deserve that promotion.

But do you get that promotion? The tips in this month’s piece could make all the difference.

Check it out now.

And once again, I’d like to invite you to connect with me at:

All the Best,

Barry

There are Motivational Speakers Who Are More than Motivational.

Why Should I Keep Trying So Hard: Staying Motivated in Business

In this Issue:

Article: Why Should I Keep Trying So Hard: Staying Motivated in Business

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Hi Everyone:

One of the most common questions I get from people in virtually every imaginable field is, “How can I stay motivated in my work?”

This month’s article offers 46 different tips for doing just that. And if you’re not currently motivated to read all 46, try reading just one or two a day.

Click here to read it now.

And once again, I’d like to invite you to connect with me at:

All the Best,

Barry

Overcoming Pre-Interview Jitters

In this Issue:

• Article: Overcoming Pre-Interview Jitters

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Hi Everyone:

Big events in our lives tend to create big reactions in our bodies. The tips and strategies in this article on overcoming pre-interview nervousness can help in any number of different sweat-inducing situations.

Click here to read it now.

And once again, I’d like to invite you to connect with me at:

All the Best,

Barry

How to Get on Your Boss’s Good Side (Without Brown Nosing)

In this Issue:

Article: How to Get on Your Boss’s Good Side (Without Brown Nosing)

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Hi Everyone:

Nobody likes a kiss-up, yet everyone wants to succeed. And that usually means being in your boss’s good graces.

How to Get on Your Boss’s Good Side (Without Brown Nosing) might be the perfect title for an article on a skill everyone with a boss needs to master. Click here to read it now.

And once again, I’d like to invite you to connect with me at:

All the Best,

Barry

Maintaining Balance

Hi Everyone:

Happy holidays to each and every one of you.

With all the festivities, this is also the time of year when we get the most requests for tips on keeping our work lives from spinning out of balance, particularly from people who, like me, do all or part of their work at home. Not that I can really claim any expertise on balance. I love what I do but I probably do have a tendency to spend too much time doing it. Maybe that’s why I found a number of the ideas in the following article truly worthwhile:

http://tinyurl.com/m598ugc

The tip from me may seem familiar to regular readers, but it’s worth repeating. (It’s also worth reminding myself to do it.)

As always, I’m at @barrymaher for those of you who are interested in following my occasional—very occasional—tweets.

All the Best,

Barry

Acing the First 90 Days on the Job

In this Issue:

Article: “Acing the First 90 Days on the Job”

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Hi Everyone:

The good news is that I’m hearing from more and more people who are starting a new job. Some have been unemployed, in many cases for frighteningly long periods of time. Others simply became comfortable enough with the economy to put out feelers, and got themselves an offer too good to refuse.

Taking on a new job can be exciting but it can also be extraordinarily stressful. Here are a few tips that might help: Nine Steps to Acing the First 90 Days of a New Job.

And as I’ve said before, I’m at @barrymaher for those of you who are interested in following my VERY occasional tweets.

All the Best,

Barry

Surviving Travel Disasters

Hi Everyone:

In my business, I travel all the time. And since getting from one place to another can be more of an adventure than we might like, I’m always getting asked about how I handle one travel disaster or another. In this month’s article from Katie Morell and the American Express Open Forum, I offer a few tips for what to do when you arrive at your location unaccompanied by your luggage.

http://www.openforum.com/articles/business-travel-2012-how-to-survive-travel-day-disasters

Once again, I’m at @barrymaher for those of you who are interested in following my occasional tweets. As I’ve said before, they are, and will continue to be, occasional.

All the Best,

Barry

Motivation Not Included

By Malcolm Fletcher

This month’s feature article is from Selling Power‘s Incentives Newsletter. It’s by Malcolm Fletcher, based on his interviews with Barry.

Click here to read Motivation Not Included

Letters from Readers

Hello Steve,

I’ve read both of Barry’s books and I love his no-nonsense blend of optimist-realist style. Each newsletter is chockfull of great ideas and I was wondering if I could get his previous newsletters. I belong to his newsletter group (yahoo groups), but can’t access the archive.

If I were given access to the previous newsletter, this would only be for *personal use* and not for publishing anywhere.

Could you help? Thank you!

Warmly,

George Milosevich

Dear George:

Thanks very much for the kind words. Back issues of the newsletters are archived on our website. Simply go to www.barrymaher.com/free_newsletter.htm and scroll down the page.

This newsletter and all Barry’s articles are of course copyrighted. If you’d like to use them for anything beyond personal use, simply contact Barry or myself.

Kindest Regards,

Steve

Steve Wilson
Barry Maher & Associates